EQ and The Big 4

Emotional intelligence (i.e., emotional quotient or EQ) is the ability to understand, use, and manage your emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflict. EQ changes as we learn more about emotions. 

Parents are their children's biggest (and first) teachers. As parents, we provide myriad lessons from which our children learn. When we are mindful and present scenarios with intention, our children benefit. Taking the time to teach children as young as two or three years old about basic emotions helps provide a foundation for future learning. Teaching them about emotions and safe ways to express them helps establishes a blueprint for self-expression, an essential life skill. 

Humans are emotional beings, and every emotion we have falls under one of the Big 4 Emotion Houses of glad, mad, sad, and scared, and most of us often feel a mix of these. This is natural. 

A simple activity families can do together but that can also be done by individuals is to create Big 4 Emotion Houses. Be imaginative. You can use pen and paper, markers, pencils, paint, modeling clay, popsicle sticks, and/or hot glue. Create a glad house, a sad house, a mad house, and a scared house. Consider what other emotions reside in these houses and find ways to express those, too. 

Not only does this activity help you see how extensive your emotional vocabulary is, but it also helps you identify emotions to be able to discuss them. Keep these houses handy and add to them when a new emotion word comes to mind. You can also jot down memories, activities, and events that fall within each house. Identifying, sharing, and discussing emotions is a big part of healthy self-expression and sets children up for high EQ as adults.